sometimes i think i cant not be sad or i cant really bring myself to cope with whatever's gonna happen. not now, and maybe not ever. its like if i ever wind down the unhappiness or the level of :( im getting its like making your presence seem less and less important. its like only if i dont care if youre around that ill be un-sad. but thats so not true cos i really wished youll be around. i dont now what i can do/what i cant cope without you here, but i know that i cant help it too. its not my call, not in my power, so i cant do anything but wish for the best for you. and yes, this moment is too important for me to not fear the probable diminishing of the now. so im sad. so ill constantly be reminded that i have to start getting used to it, ill constantly be reminded of the differences that will become, that will happen. yea, i think i need to grow up, but i dont think i can grow out of this. it leaves me helpless but oh wells, this is life.

a choice says alot. and it speaks for itself.

when we put two things on the balance and compare the pros and cons, choosing something will ultimately make the other lose out.but everyone works the same way. the econs way, a choice is made so you lose less and get more, something more important, more essential. and whats left is just the opportunity cost. its a cost no doubt, and itll hurt. and people choose so that there is less opp cost? so that they wont hurt so much rather than what will happen if it happens the other way round? i guess there must be a reason why econs works this way, cos in general the world works this way too. maybe its just more practical and logical and rational to work this way.

and yet choices, and so hurt, is part and parcel of growing up. its a way to find ourselves. but specialising, by eliminating, by choosing, by shedding, by picking your future, custom-made so that it turns out the most ideal. and we all have to learn to let go of stuff someday. im learning, but yea i think itll take me forever to get there.



香格里拉--魏如萱

我以為認真去做就能實現我的夢
以為寫首好歌走路就能抬起頭
以為騎摩托車旅行就能變英雄
現在的我失去了衝動

有才華的人唾棄金光閃閃的獎座
親愛的 Cobain　是否也曾愛慕虛榮
多希望有人衝破疑惑帶我向前走
現在的我變的好懦弱

雨會下雨會停　這是不變的道理
夜空中北極星　迷路的人不恐懼
我唱歌你在聽　一切風平又浪靜
Ｇ和絃的根音　撫平脆弱的心靈

我只想牽著你　走到很遠的夢裡
小木屋紅屋頂　地址是一個秘密
你抱著小貓咪　藍眼睛不再憂鬱
香格里拉　讓我們去找尋

我只想牽著你　走到很遠的夢裡
小木屋紅屋頂　地址是一個秘密
你抱著小貓咪　藍眼睛不再憂鬱
香格里拉在那裡　讓我們去找尋

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